Larry Kudlow takes his douchebaggery to a new level

Larry Kudlow always looks like he’s pushing out a turtle head.

Previously I have documented what a depraved bankster-humping shill CNBC’s Larry Kudlow is, even more so than his coworkers. I even wrote a sample opinion about this specimen for my ill-fated application to Matt Taibbi’s Supreme Court of Assholedom. Kudlow is a guy who spoke out in favor of government bailouts for Wall Street while advocating cuts in programs for anyone whose job doesn’t including working with a trading platform.

It’s one thing to gleefully espouse the cause of the ruling class oligarchs on television on a daily basis; in fact, it’s almost a requirement for being a mainstream market analyst. But it’s quite another to throw down this gauntlet on national television, as Kudlow did Friday on CNBC. Speaking about the giant earthquake in Japan, where the death toll is expected to exceed 10,000, the plutocratic douche had this to say:

“The human toll here looks to be much worse than the economic toll, and we can be grateful for that. And the human toll is a tragedy. We know that. But these markets are—all these markets, right—stocks, commodities, gold, there is no breakout or breakdown. And I have to look at that as positive.”

Yes, thank god this earthquake didn’t spook the commodities speculators and day traders, who apparently didn’t see much opportunity in trying to exploit this particular catastrophe. And thank god we have Larry Kudlow to remind us that is what really counts in all this. Thousands of Jap workers can be replaced, but markets take a while to recover. We really dodged a bullet.

Now, since taking flak for his comments, Kudlow has issued a mea culpa via Twitter:

“I did not mean to say human toll in Japan less important than economic toll.Talking about markets.I flubbed the line. Sincere apology.”

Does anyone honestly think this guy didn’t mean to say what he said? Watch the clip again and tell me that’s not a man who believes with every fiber of his poltroonish being everything he’s saying. As for his tweet, it’s a typed apology consisting of three sentence fragments and one actual sentence in less than 140 characters. Larry, you didn’t have to go to all that trouble.

- Max

max.canning@gmail.com